If I Had Twitter

most of these are backdated from the notes on my laptop

June 2023

when slash where did you learn to blow your noise so fucking loud - a question to older white men x

October 2023

if the slack bot talks to me about my fucking google doc link one more time im buying a gun THIS IS A JOKE

October 2023

its almost incomprehensible that you can ban a book for having racism and misogyny in it bc its “too tough for kids to deal with” but you will over fund police (who are good at both racism and misogyny) and let them run free

November 2023

“adopt a whale!” “adopt a star!” “adopt a tree!” adopt a sense of responsibility to care for things that you don’t own for godsake

January 2024

facebook is broken and instagram a vulture

January 2024

an endless flake shake

February 2024

surrounded by slow walking twinks, reality bends minds

February 2024

i am sick of ads about procrastination being about AI

June 2025

just had 7 mentos

June 2025

the male urge to stand in a group in a parking lot

June 2025

what the fuck are all these ACC adds that are like “look after urself. bc what about ur job”

July 2025

forever mixing up looking for alaska and paper towns. too many young men’s perspective on not-actually-allusive women. they're only mysterious in the way you don't know the plot to a book you haven't read.

July 2025

its okay brendon urie i think you're a sad clown too

July 2025

thinking of a nice long usbc wire

July 2025

the amount of times i have messaged the whole zoom chat when i have not intended to... it is unbearable.

July 2025

cheese is simply just for cracker. not for fruit despite what the government wants you to think. free ur minds.

July 2025

i think i am actually timothee chalamet's character in ladybird. insufferable and suspicious of the govt.

July 2025

im not sure i actually know what chat gpt is. is it a website??

July 2025

oggb fire alarm... mass exodus of business majors... scary stuff.

July 2025

watching a terribly insightful video about d.a.r.e and turns out they actually increased mj use. turns out one of the main bros was a terrible racist cop. by their fruits you will know them.

August 2025

new zealand loves to pretend that they are inconsequential on the global stage but then will suck the dick and balls of the nearest fascist. we're not inconsequential, we're the west's bitch and it shows in ur darn policy.

August 2025

transcribing a zoom call... and for the first time, the allure of AI reaches me.

August 2025

subverting the "maybe i could fix him" and changing it to the "i was going to fix him but i didn't get around to it" about draco malfoy of all people is very funny.

August 2025

what the FUCK is aura farming

August 2025

I am worried about the gall of adobe and the right to repair.